Skincare Routine!

I called this blog 'The Makeup Misanthrope,' because I like makeup and I'm kind of a misanthrope. I prefer for those damn kids to get off my lawn, I prefer to sit in the quiet, and have a mild problem with authority. For instance, I got a parking ticket today and contemplated taking it to the nearest cop shop and setting it on fire. JUST JOKES! But on the real, I'm a little rough sometimes.

Not terribly deep. Not incredibly complex. Mostly just cranky. 

But who cares about that when there is a skincare routine to talk about? Let's talk about it!

Morning: I don't wash my face with cleanser, unless I fell asleep in my makeup WHICH I WOULD NEVER DO OMG (all the time). I take a warm washcloth and gently rub my mug, then swipe it with toner  (TONER) and then moisturize. If my eyes are puffy, I cover them in the coldest water I can for some splashes. Except lately I've been using Origins Ginzing Refreshing Eye Cream for puffiness. OK! Here's what I will tell you about that product: It's worth it if you have a pronounced problem with puffiness/bags, because from what I can tell, it does do something nice to the skin there.  I have a bottle because it came with something else I bought that TOTALLY DIDN'T WORK (another post), so I'm using it because it just feels nice in the morning.

Night: If I need to exfoliate, I use my little rough shower gloves, which I got for about 2 bucks at Target. I'm not going to link to them because you can find them anywhere and they are all similar prices, and also all the same quality, in my opinion. If it's not an exfoliation day, I just cleanse, swipe with TONER LOVE IT SO MUCH, then moisturize.

Here's my products. Keep in mind I love to switch things up, so I will include several things here that I like, things I haven't liked, etc.

Cleanser:
Origins Checks and Balances. A. Maze. Zing. I have these tiny clogs in my skin, and they just take care of them so awesomely. This CAN be drying, so you'll want to tone and moisturize right away.

Cetaphil/Cerave/generic knock off: Super-gentle, I use this if I happen to feel sweaty/grimy in the morning, or when I'm exfoliating. It doesn't quite get all my makeup off on it's own, and I don't like makeup remover, so I need a cleanser to do the job. I also use this on my kid, who would prefer to never wash her face ever.

Dr. Bronner's Baby Mild Soap: We all use this in our house for faces, hair, body, etc. Can't go wrong. Lasts forever. The label alone is worth the price. Just trust me.

Brother was a freak, but he sure loved his soap. 

Toner:
Oh toner, shall I write thee a sonnet to express my love for thee? I SHALL. When I remember what the smack a sonnet is.

mmmmmkay. I'm also not sure it really matters what toner you use. Here are my faves, and they all work equally well:

United State by Origins

Witch Hazel

Witch Hazel, you cray! 

Loreal Hydra Fresh


I guess if you were going to listen to any advice I would dispense, I'd want you to listen to my toner advice, which is this: USE TONER. It doesn't matter if your skin is dry, oily, or both; toner will get that last residue of makeup/skin cells/sleep nastiness off your face, and fresh for moisturizing. If I don't use it, my face gets a slight crusty sheen to it, which, NASTY. I recommend using cotton pads instead of balls, if you want to stretch the toner further. Like I said, you don't have to break the bank, Witch Hazel works just as well as anything else, in my opinion. DO EET.

Divine says, "USE TONER OR ELSE!" 

No more bossin' ya for a bit, just had to get that in there.

Moisturizer:
Sigh. Oh, moisturizer. I just don't know about you. You are so necessary, yet so confounding. Umm...I have so many moisturizers, I'm like a moisturizer library. You could come and check some out from a cataloguing system that I made based on Dewey Decimal. JK, I don't know if that's still a thing. HERE'S THE SHIT:

I'll start with the Best Moisturizer Of All Time:        

Estee Lauder Time Zone : This stuff is just the golden doubloon of moisturizers. In fact, I feel a lump forming in my throat that I am currently out of it. It's light enough to feel smooth and absorbent going on, but rich enough to actually work and look great under your makeup. It should NOT be my favorite: It's anti-line/anti-wrinkle creme, which usually makes me break out, but this stuff doesn't! It rilly rilly doesn't! It smells so good you will want to sniff your own face all day. (I tried to.) If moisturizer is a big deal to you, and you haven't had good luck, and you can splurge a bit, you CANNOT BEAT THIS SHIZZ.

Cerave: This is the Amish wife of moisturizers: works hard, doesn't complain, and doesn't wear buttons. Really, though, this stuff is awesome. It doesn't smell like anything, but if you have skin that is even slightly sensitive, Cerave is the way to go. You can't beat the price, and that link is to the AM and PM version. The AM version has a nice SPF which is a big deal to me because white girls can't jump, but I only use the PM version in the dead of dry winter, because it's a little rich for me. The ingredients are nice, in that there aren't any fake ones. By "fake" I don't mean "all natural," because "all natural" doesn't necessarily mean much in the cosmetic industry. I mean it doesn't have a bunch of fancy pants garbage added at the end to look awesome. Like I said, Amish.

Pond's: Another stand-by! You might think only your grandma used Ponds, and you would be RIGHT. It smells like a woman named Dorothy, and I heart it. Cheap as chipper chicken, works like a dream. The only thing you won't like (or if you're me, YOU WILL) is that perfume-y smell, but it goes away after you apply. For moisturizing purposes, (and if you're stuck somewhere in the woods and the only convenience store has one jar of Ponds) rest assured it is a treat. (I also like the cold cream, but that's for winter, sillies.) I'm not linking because come on. Ponds.



Now we come to the new experiment. Just picked up this little beauty:

A Perfect World SPF 25: Don't know yet. Hasn't made me break out. We're having a hotter-than-the-hinges-of-hell-heatwave here in sunny Minnesota, and it hasn't felt heavy at all. So that's a plus. Is it worth the price? It feels better to me than Cerave, but not better than Pond's. It does smell better than Ponds, though, and my skin looks better than when I use Ponds, but keep in mind I'm also pregnant and drinking TONS of lemon water and taking prenatals, so that makes a difference too.  I would still go for Estee Lauder.

Quick aside about night cream: I generally don't use it in the warm months, but in the winter I need to. I repeat myself by saying I don't believe in anti-wrinkle stuff, and it also makes me break out, so I strictly use it for moisturizing. Cerave PM, Ponds Night Cream are great bets, honestly. However, I have a sample dark horse in the running: Weleda Baby Calendula Cream. I specifically got it to try to tone down my red blotchiness, and after four days, I gotta say, I'm pretty impressed. FYI!

Tune in next time when Pregnant Girl Wonder dishes on subscription boxes! Coming down the pike: BB creams and what the heck are they and what is my fave? My love for lemons! And My Current Dream Product: Will it be BS or worth the money?

Hiya, also FOUNDATION.

HAI.

Here I am. Doing this because I love love LURVE any and all makeup products. I love trying them, love telling people about them. I like cheap and I like pricey. I can drop hotness at Walgreen's or Sephora, don't matter none. The packaging, the smell, the texture, the different uses. I like trying this shizz WAY more than I like actually wearing it.

My personal style is Midwestern mom meets middle school art teacher. I like T-shirts, jeans, and Converses when I ain't doin' nothing. I like flowy knits and sandals with chunky jewelry and wild hair when I'm out with my guy or friends. I keep up on fashion, including couture, but rarely wear any of it. I stick to the basics.

I'm very stingy with my money, and love nothing more than to tell you when you're being ripped off and when you're getting a good deal.

Not a "can't-leave-the-house-without-makeup" kind of person. Today I went to the co-op with my kid and wore yoga pants and a tank top with flip flops, frizzy hair, and nothing on my face but moisturizer. That said, I also like slathering on the slap, the actual act of applying makeup, and being creative with products and application.

                 

  My favorite look, y'all! 

My beauty "philosophy," which I am making up as I type this, is "wear what makes you want to accomplish what you need to in a day." If that's nothing, great. If you want to do full-on eyes/lips/greasepaint, knock yourself out. Do what you want, and don't let anyone OPPRESS you with their RULES, MAN.

My idea for this blog is the post stuff that the average gal can do and afford, and answer questions she (or he, for that matter) might have. I like all of the body things. I get my stuff from Walgreen's, Target, Sephora, makeup counters, and online. There is nothing beauty or fashion-related that I'm not fascinated with, although fashion is more of an admiration-from-afar kind of thing, mostly because I am too lazy and need to be too comfortable to wear much more than my uniforms.

OK! ENOUGH INTRO! With no further ado, I bring you my first topic: Foundation. My skin is dry with oily T-zones, commonly called "combination skin." I had mad acne when I was in college, but I took Accutane and that cleared it up. (Don't take Accutane. For another post.) My skin now is pasty, and even in the steamy sun of a Minnesota summer, I have to wear the lightest shade of foundation, for I am a person of the dark, furtively spending my life in the cool darkness of the underground, while the world plays in sunlight. ANYHOOTS. I like pricey foundation. It smells good, lasts longer, and the coverage is usually pretty great. THAT SAID, you do NOT have to splurge on foundation. Revlon Age Defying has a nice whipped quality to it, and the coverage is nice and moisturizing. It's wear is long enough, nothing to write home about, don't get excited, but at about $10 a bottle, I think it's a good value.

Estee Lauder Double Wear Stay in Place Makeup is better, for about $40. Is it $30 better? Depends on your needs. It smells better, and the coverage is great. The finish is very smooth, no flaking or curdling grossness. I was also really happy with the color.

For coverage, you really can't beat Mary Kay for quality and value. It doesn't smell that awesome, but you're probably sitting there like, 'What is this woman's obsession with things smelling good?' and you probably could give a rat's ass what is smells like. If a rat's ass is not given, then this is the foundation for you. I use it as more of a concealer, actually, but that's not it's purpose, go all out. My only complaint is that I can't find a color that works perfectly, so it's not my go-to, but I still use it for funky-colored areas. Dude, the price! SRSLY.

Bobbi Brown Corrector.  I know people think this is the kitty's jammies, but the kind I picked up about a month back is not impressive. Granted, it could be the way it's packaged: I got the compact instead of a bottle, but if I'm paying $40, it should be good. It look cakey and doesn't glide on well, although it seems to last relatively well. The color does match my skin tone, so I wear it as another concealer, mostly around my nose and mouth where I have red patches. I wouldn't buy it again.

AIGHT! Message me in the comments with other recommendations, if ya got 'em, or questions if ya got those, too.